Dare Ninjas Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto
by misakiXinuzuka
Summary: I know there are plenty of Naruto Truth And Dare fics out there but here's another one. Please don't flame me if you made one and you feel I copied you. Maybe politely inform me about if it does bug you. So this is a naruto truth and dare w/ all ninjas!
1. Welcome To Dare Ninjas!

Misaki: Hi people! You all know me, the authoress.

Akari: And me, the friend of the authoress.

Misaki: -jumps into the air- Holy crap! When the hell did you get here?!

Akari: I've been here….

Misaki: Really?

Akari: Yah…

Misaki: O….Kay….Well anyways! Welcome to Dare Ninjas! This is where you as the reviewers all dare (or truth) the ninjas of Naruto!

Akari: Look, here they come now! –points at doors-

Lee: I am here to pick up our youthful pizza of youthfulness!

Misaki: You….did you get him here by?

Akari: Yup.

Misaki: Wow….And he fell for it?

Akari: Apparently.

Misaki: Sweetness!

Akari: I know, right!

Misaki: But…what about everyone else?

Akari: Did you tell me to take care of it?

Misaki: I did.

Akari: Then don't worry! –in George Lopez voice- I got this!

Misaki: Right.

Chouji: -barges in- Where's the free food?!

Misaki: -laughs-

Akari: What?

Misaki: He waddles!

Akari: -looks at Misaki weird then starts laughing-

Itachi: -skips in- Tra-la-la…

Lee: Why are you here oh un-youthful Akatsuki member?

Itachi: I got a letter in the mail.

Lee: What'd it say?

Akari: -nudges Misaki- Hehe, this one's funny.

Itachi: There's a sale on make-up.

Misaki: That was funny?

Akari: You know you wanna laugh! –pokes Misaki-

Misaki: True, true… -laughs-

Akari: That's better!

Jiraiya: Am I late?! –looks around worriedly-

Misaki: Why would you be late? _What_ would you be late for?

Tsunade: -walks in- Where's the money and booze?!

Jiraiya: I'm the new breast examination doctor.

Tsunade: -chokes- I'm leaving!!!

Akari: Not so fast! –glues doors shut-

Misaki: Now how are the others gonna get in?

Other Ninjas: -break in through roof-

Tsunade: -jumps out of roof- Haha! Freedom!!!

Akari: Crap…

Misaki: No no, I can handle this. A THOUSAND BUCKS TO WHOEVER CATCHES TSUNADE!!!!!

Tsunade: -rushes back in- I caught myself!!!!

Misaki: You don't get no money.

Tsunade: Shit.

Akari: Well review and dare the Naruto characters.

Misaki: All of them are here.

Akari: Sadly that includes Guy and Lee –shudders-

Misaki: -cries- They're so creepy!!!!! –smiles- Review please! Truths and dares accepted!


	2. Muahaha!

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Naruto or any of the characters in it. If I did, Kiba would be mine! Mine I tell you!!!! Muahahaha!!!!! –cough- okay onto the story!

~StOrY~

Misaki: Welcome to Dare Ninjas! I'm your host, Misaki!

Akari: We have three reviews!

Misaki: Welcome Chariline!

Chariline: Konichiwa.

Akari: Alright Chariline, what are your dares?

Chariline: Well, I need Naruto for this one –smiles evilly-

Kakashi: Naruto? You _need_ Naruto? That's not something you hear everyday.

Naruto: Yes she needs me! BELIEVE IT!!!

Sasuke: Dobe, that's not a good thing.

Chariline: Anyway, Naruto I dare you to wear this! –holds up a chicken suit-

Naruto: What?! You want me to wear that?!

Misaki: Oh and that's not all…-laughs evilly-

Naruto: -gulps- It isn't?

Chariline: Nope. You also have to run around Konoha making distressed cow noises.

Naruto: N-nani? ((Nani is Japanese for "What?"

Akari: You heard the lady now move it mister!

Naruto: No way!

Misaki: -glares-

Naruto: Eep…

Misaki: You better believe "eep"!

Naruto: I am not wearing a chicken suit!

Akari: Too late.

Naruto: Nani? It's not too late.

Sasuke: -smiles-

Misaki: Oh my god!!!!!!! Sasuke smiled!!! We're all going to die!!!! Run away!!!! –runs around in circles-

Akari: Oi… -slaps forehead-

Naruto: -looks down- Holy crap! I'm wearing the chicken suit!!! What the hell?

Misaki: Ahem. Don't say "holy crap".

Naruto: I'm sorry. _Holy crud_.

Misaki: No!!!!! You're supposed to say "holy crap nuts"!!!

Naruto:….

Chariline: Now go run around making cow noises!

Naruto: But-

Chariline: -interrupts Naruto- NOW.

Naruto: Fine… -runs around Konoha making distressed cow noises-

Everyone: -laughs-

Misaki: Alright –laughs- now we –laughs- have Kinou Uchiha –wipes tear away-

Akari: Come on out Kinou!

Kinou: Hi!

Misaki: So what are you're dares and/or truths?

Kinou: Well first I need to know: Lee, are you –pauses dramatically- gay?

Lee: Of course not! I am very youthful and to commit such a sin as to be attracted to the same gender would be very unyouthful!

Misaki: You got a problem with gay people?!

Lee: O-of course not! I did not mean to offend you! I had no idea you were gay!

Misaki: What? I'm not gay. I just think gay guys are cool.

Akari: Which they are!

Misaki: Of course!

Kinou: Ahem. Anyway, Lee I dare you to kiss Guy!

Lee: -chokes- N-nani? Excuse me?

Guy: I have no problem with that! If you must kiss me then you must! I have no objections!

Akari: –does crazy whistle- Who the hell would wanna make out with Bushy Brow?

Misaki: Bushier Brow-Sensei.

Akari: True…

Lee: -kisses Guy-

Guy: -starts to make out with Lee…upon doing other things that I cannot mention because this fic is Rated T-

Kinou/Misaki/Akari: My eyes!!!!! –stumble around blindly-

Tobi: Tobi wants to know who's next! Tell Tobi!

Kinou: Right. Next, Sasuke-

Sasuke: -groans- Oh Kami… ((Japanese for "God"))

Kinou: -glares at Sasuke- As I was saying before I was so_ rudely_ interrupted: Sasuke, do you like Sakura?

Sasuke: Of course. From the darkest, shadowy depths of my heart.

Misaki: -chokes- He _actually_ likes her?

Akari: Ah!!!! I don't like him at all anymore!!!!

Sasuke: I have had many dreams where we-

Akari/Misaki/Kinou: LALALALALALA!!!! WE CAN'T HEAR YOU!!!!!

Kinou: Sasuke! Enough about that! Kiss Naruto!!!

Naruto: Yay! –skips over to Sasuke- Gimme all you got!!!!

Sasuke: No way!

Naruto: -cries-

Kinou: -glares at Sasuke- See what you did?!

Sasuke: -sighs- Fine….-kisses Naruto on the cheek-

Kinou: Nuh uh! On the lips!

Sasuke: But-

Kinou: NOW!

Sasuke: -groans-

Naruto: -in a seductive voice- You're so sexy when you groan…

Misaki: Rated T _please_!!!!

Sasuke: -kisses Naruto-

Naruto: -moans-

Sasuke: Glances side to side, picks up Naruto and leaves-

A note is found in his place stating "We are at a hotel. Oh and Sakura, I changed my mind. I decided I don't like you."

Sakura: NO!!!!!!! Naruto you will die!!!!!

Kinou: ….uh….umm….Sakura, do you like Naruto as well as Sasuke?

Sakura: You think I'd like Naruto after _that_? No way! I wanna kill him!

Kinou: Well, I hope you don't hate Lee.

Sakura: -looks a Kinou suspiciously- Why….?

Kinou: I dare you to make out with him.

Sakura/Guy: What?! No way!!!

Akari: He is _really_ starting to creep me out…

Misaki: I know, right?

Kinou: Do it!

Guy: -stands in front of Lee protectively- MINE!!!!!

Misaki: -glares at Guy- Move!

Guy: -shudders- Okay.

Sakura: -cries and kisses Lee-

Lee: -cries- I don't wanna kiss you ever again!

Sakura: Why the hell not?!

Lee: I'm in love with Guy-sensei!

Misaki/Akari: Ahh!!!!! –run around in circles screaming like psychos-

Kinou: A-anyway….Um…Shikama- -notices Shikamaru sleeping-

Akari: I got this. –walks up to Shikamaru- PINEAPPLE ASS!!!! WAKE UP!!!!

Shikamaru: -snores-

Misaki: Hey Zetsu…

Zetsu: What?

Misaki: Are you hungry?

Zetsu: A little…

Misaki: You wanna eat Shikamaru?

Zetsu: Yes!!!

Shikamaru: No!!!!!!!!!!!! –jumps in the air-

Kinou: Ok, Shikamau, do you like Ino?

Shikamaru: Yes.

Temari: Excuse me?!

Shikamaru: I-I mean no. No I don't.

Ino: You jerk!! –storms off-

Akari/Misaki: -party- Ino's gone today olay!

Misaki: Anyway, we have one more person to introduce!

Akari: Welcome, Jasper Whitlock Lover!

Jasper Whitlock Luver: Hiya!

Misaki: Why?! Why is _everyone_ so obsessed with Twilight?!

Jasper Whitlock Luver: You don't like Twilight?

Misaki: No, I like it. I just hate it when people are so obsessed with it. Of course I don't hate you. You're dare rules!!!!! I heart you!

Jasper Whitlock Luver: …um…..okay? Well I dare Guy and Jiraiya to streak.

Guy: What?!

Jiraiya: All right! –takes all his clothes off and happy dances.

Misaki: My eyes!!!! They burn!!!!

Guy: -takes clothes off-

Jiraiya/Guy: -run around streaking-

Akari/Misaki/Jasper Whitlock Luver: Oh my god!!!!! My eyes!!!! Lord save me!!!!!

~EnD oF cHaPpIe-TeR~

I hope that was okay. I'm not that good at this for the moment, but I promise it will get funnier. So please review and tell me what you think!

I thank Chariline, Kinou Uchiha, and Jasper Whitlock Luver for reviewing! You all get cookies!

Whoever reviews this chapter gets an imaginary holographic meatloaf!


	3. CoHosts and Rabid Bunnies

Sorry I didn't update sooner. I know it's been an uber (that's a funny word isn't it? Uber. Hehe.) long time, but my computer went completely wacko. It's on drugs. It stole my coke (a-cola), I know it. And my weed. Oh! Happy National Weed day!!! Remember to smoke at 4:20 today! Don't actually, weed's bad for you. Really bad. Like it make you go VOOSH. Like my wacko high computer. Anyway! Onto the story!!!!

--|--|--|--|--|--|--|--|--

Misaki: And welcome back! Okay so I give imaginary holographic meatloaf to *drum roll* Chariline, Jasper Whitlock Luver, and Brightness Of Yuki. *gives imaginary holographic meatloaf to the mentioned* And because Chariline and Jasper Whitlock Luver reviewed _both _of my chapters they shall receive a virtual plushie of their choice. And Brightness Of Yuki gets one too because her name reminds me of Yuki from Fruits Basket.

Naruto: I want ramen!

Misaki: After the show!

Naruto: Then hurry up! Believe it!

Misaki: Fine! Welcome Chariline!

Chariline: I left no dares or truths…..

Misaki: Well you reviewed first so you shall be co-host!

Chariline: What do I do?

Misaki: You co-host!

Chariline: That explains _everything_…

Misaki: So lets give a warm welcome to *silence*

Chariline: *staring blankly*

Misaki: Ahem. *nudges Chariline*

Chariline: Yeeeeessss???

Misaki: So lets give a warm welcome to *silence* *stage whisper* Insert name here!!!!

Chariline: Oh. Um…Jasper Whitlock Luver?

Misaki: Yay!!!! You get a cookie!

Chariline: Really?

Misaki: No.

Chariline: Bi-

Misaki: No cursing me! I shall erase you!

Chariline: How?

Misaki: I am the authoress! Do not question my powers!

Chariline: Bi- *nose gets erased*

Misaki: I wasn't kidding!

Chariline: *in funny voice* Can I have my nose back? *left eye gets erased*

Misaki: Me no kid!

Chariline: *in funny voice* I didn't say a cuss word!

Misaki: You just did! *erases right eye*

Chariline: *in funny voice* No!

Misaki: Yes! You literally said "a cuss word".

Chariline: *in funny voice* I love you?

Misaki: Fine. *un-erases Chariline* But remember. Me no kid!

Chariline: Um…okay? Anyway. Welcome Jasper Whitlock Luver!

Jasper Whitlock Luver: But I left no dares or truths either….

Misaki: *sighs* Then you can co-co-host.

Jasper Whitlock Luver: Okay….um….Welcome Brightness Of Yuki.

Misaki: That's Yuki to you!

Jasper Whitlock Luver: Okay…um….Welcome Yuki.

Misaki: That's better!

Yuki: Hi, Misaki!

Misaki: Hi new reviewer! *higs yuki*

Yuki: Okay. My first one isn't a dare, but *whispers in Misaki's ear*

Misaki: *nods* Yes can do. *whispers in Kiba's ear*

Kiba: *whispers in Akamaru's ear*

Akamaru: *chases rabid bunnies*

Kiba: *pushes Guy in the way*

Rabid Bunnies: *maul Gai*

Gai: OUCH! THIS IS VERY UNYOUTHFUL YUKI!!!! HELP ME!!!! GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!!

Misaki: Why should we? Yuki isn't youthful. You called her old.

Gai: Fine!!! You're very youthful Yuki-chan!!!

Misaki: *erases wild rabid bunnies*

---with Orochimaru---

Orochimaru: *gets attacked by rabid bunnies* Kabuto!!!!!!

---back with us---

Yuki: My first _real_ dare is for Sasuke.

Sasuke: *in thoughts* _Crap..._

Yuki: First you must put this on. *hands Sasuke skimpy cupid outfit*

Sasuke: I'm not wearing that.

Misaki: You better.

Sasuke: Or what?

Misaki: *erases Sasuke's nose*

Sasuke: No!!!! My beautiful nose!!!! I'll wear it!!!! Just gimme my nose back before this becomes permanent!!!!!

Misaki: *gives nose back*

Sasuke: *puts outfit on*

Misaki: *cracks up laughing* You look….you look like Sakura!!!! But worse!!!!

Sakura: Hey!!!!!

Sasuke: What's the rest of the dare?

Yuki: Now you fly around Konoha.

Sasuke: No.

Misaki: I swear, if you want your nose…!!!!

Sasuke: Fine!!!! *flies around Konoha*

Yuki: Yay!!! Now for my next dare…..Jiraiya!

Jiraiya: Yes oh beautiful Yuki?

Misaki: Back off! You ain't getting none of this!!!! *hugs Yuki* Yuki is mine!

Yuki: Um…sure. Anyway. Jiraiya, you must burn ALL of your pervy books.

Jiraiya: NO!!!!! I refuse!!!!

Misaki: I'll erase em all if you don't. Plus Tsunade's boobs will disappear!

Tsunade: *drunk*

Jiraiya: Burn them and boobs. Get them erased and no boobs….Fine….You win….*starts fire*

Misaki: *throws books in*

Jiraiya: *cries in emo corner*

Sasuke: Hey!!! That's my emo corner!!!! Get your own!!!!

Misaki: Shouldn't you be flying around Konoha?

Sasuke: I hate you, *flies around Konoha some more*

Yuki: And finally!!!! Deidara must make out with me….

Misaki: Or more. Cuz I'm the authoress and I say so.

------CENSORED FOR THINGS THAT GUY WOULD CONSIDER UNYOUTHFUL…and this fic is rated T, not M. Damn.--------

Misaki: And that's our show! Please review! And if you review, please leave dares. Any reviewers for this chapter get brownies. Reviewers with dares or truths get hot fudge to go with it. And Chariline, Jasper Whitlock Luver, and Yuki, please tell me which virtual plushies you want. I _may_ get bored and find you picture. Plus, I just feel like knowing.

Asuma: Happy Weed Day!!!!!

Misaki: Of course _he'd_ care….

----fade out----


	4. Hairless Sasuke & Kakashi Revealed!

I am soooo mega sorry for not updating in forever. I tend to get really lazy with my stories so just doing three is a stretch for me. Anyway, I gave Chariline her plushie but totally forgot about Brightness Of Yuki and Princess Of Blah Blah Blah (I'm sensing a pen name change .) so I'll include the links in here, plus virtual cookies for the wait. I am sooo sorry.

For Yuki: ./_8DCMbuU2Hys/Shq8wrUPqTI/AAAAAAAAAAw/MeWjiU0OfLQ/s320/chibi_tobi_by_

For Princess: .com/imgres?imgurl=.&imgrefurl=.com/bahamaut&usg=__MwrhajpSQQPHYQnqRhkl3lN_Z1c=&h=288&w=174&sz=38&hl=en&start=2&tbnid=UIYx7Qvw2beyLM:&tbnh=115&tbnw=69&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dchibi%2Bminato%26gbv%3D2%26hl%3Den

And a thanks to all of my wonderful reviewers! Please keep reviewing! Here's cookies for all!

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Misaki: Okay all, welcome back to dare ninjas! The wonderful place where a kid can be a kid!

Chariline: Lookie! I have a Gaara plushie *dances*

Misaki: You were supposed to come out later..

Yuki: I have a Tobi plushie so ha!

Misaki: Wrong timing!

Princess: Well I have Minato!

Misaki: Now is not the time for you to be here!

Chariline/Yuki/Princeess: *arguing*

Misaki: ENOUGH!!!

All: *quiet*

Misaki: Good. Now, I will introduce our _first_ reviewer: Rose!

Rose: *walks out* Hi Misaki! It's so good to be here.

Misaki: And it's so good to have you here!

Chariline: I feel neglected.

Misaki: Aw, don't worry, me loves you!

Rose: Um, I dare Sakura to turn emo.

Sakura: Excuse, like, me?! Emo?! I don't, like, think so!

Misaki: *smirks* I do. And I am the almighty authoress. Bow down!

All: *bow down*

Misaki: I feel your love, I feel your love.

Sakura: Grr, fine!

Rose: Okay, meanwhile! I dare Neji to dress up in a pink, frilly, hideous, girly dress and sing "Barbie Girl"!

Neji: …I hate my life…

Misaki: Do it. NOW!

Neji: …

Misaki: If you don't, I will force you to use byakugan on Lee and Guy!

Neji: No! Don't!!!!

Misaki: Then put it on and sing *hands Neji a dress*

Neji: … *puts on dress and starts to sing Barbie Girl*

Misaki: The hilarity of it all! I must roll on the floor and laugh my ass off!!! *rotflmao*

Chariline: My dare was next!

Misaki: *sighs* Fine, go ahead.

Chariline: I don't feel welcome now….*pouts*

Misaki: I luffles you! *hugs*

Chariline: That's better. Now, I dare Sasuke to tell us if he wants to take Naruto to a gay bar!

All: Ooo

Chariline: Wait! There's more! Then I dare Naruto to tell us if he agrees or not!

All: Ahhh

Sasuke: No.

Misaki: LIE AGAIN AND I'LL NEUTER YOU!

Sasuke: I'm not lying!

Misaki: Grrr…

Sasuke: Fine! Yes!

Naruto: Finally! *grabs Sasuke's arm and drags him to gay bar* Let's go!

Misaki: And now! Princess!

Princess: Okay! Sasuke!

Sasuke: *teleports back from gay bar, naked with a boner* Fuck….

All: *eye twitch*

Misaki: I dare you to put clothes on! Hurry! We're being blinded damn it!

Princess: Shave your head and walk around in this! *shoves tutu on Sasuke*

Sasuke: I refuse to shave my hair!

Misaki/Princess: Okay then….*smirk evilly*

Sasuke: Okay, just no evil plans! *shaves head and walks around Konoha in a tutu*

Konoha: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Ino/Sakura: Eww, omfg, we like can't believe we like you!

Princess: And Naruto! Destroy all the ramen in the world! Now!

Naruto: *pops up naked and with a boner* Sasuke! Get back here and finish what you started!!! *looks around. Oh shit…

Misaki: WHY?! Why does everyone have to pop up naked! *shoves clothes on Naruto* Now destroy Ramen! Or you can suffer with a dead Sasuke and permanent boner!

Naruto: *cries and destroys ramen*

Misaki: And now we have Yuki!

Yuki: Okay! Guy! You can't be youthful for a whole chapter!

Guy: *dies*

Yuki: That worked surprisingly well…Anyway, Karin and Ino! Say you're a ** FOR THE WHOLE CHAPTER!

Karin and Ino: We're **s, were **s, we're **s *repeating*

Yuki: Kakashi!

Kakashi: *sighs* Yes?

Yuki: Show me you're face! Now!

Kakashi: Hell no!

Misaki: Now or I'll destroy every copy of Icha Icha in the world! Including yours!

Kakashi: No! Not the porn!

Misaki: Then do it!

Kakashi: *reveals face*

Misaki: *gasps* Put it back on! Put it back on!

Yuki: But he's hot!

Misaki: Exactly! And his hotness is attracting *shudders* fan-girls!

Fan-girls: *stampeding up hill*

Kakashi: *puts mask back on*

Fan-girls: *leave*

Misaki: Phew….that was close….

Yori: Yuki! *glomps*

Yuki: Holy fucking shit! When did you get here?!

Yori: Just now.

Misaki: That reminds me! Yori is our-

Yuki: Wait! I have one more dare!

Misaki: Fine. Go ahead.

Yuki: Orochimaru! Give me a cursemark so I can run away to you!

Orochimaru: *cursemarks*

Yori: Before you run away! Yuki, I dare you to eat pebbles!

Yuki: Didn't I do that in?

Yori: Yes. Now do it!

Yuki: *eats pebbles*

Misaki: Oka, that's all for now! Please truth and dare! And remember, I like beer cuz it is good! Hey…where's Akari?

--|--|--|--|--|--|--|--

Alright, that's that chapter done. Again, I'm terribly sorry for the wait. But while you wait for the next one, listen to Fireflies by Owl City and Everybody Else by Care Bears On Fire. The songs have major pwnage.


End file.
